Thursday, May 22, 2014

In Honor of the Unofficial Start of Summer

Dear Christine Lagarde,

I have no doubt you are an amazing, interesting, smart, funny woman. Really. And, since you are French, I also bet you read interesting books, eat responsibly, and speak with an appropriate volume at all times, even though you now live in America.

However, we need to talk.

There are two possible explanation for why you are suddenly the same color as John Boehner, and thus just one step away from getting made fun of by the President of the United States for your not-so-subtle orange hue. The first is that your favorite thing about America is our wide selection of self-tanners, which, I must admit, have some a long way from the ones that used to automatically turn your palms orange and smelled like Sun-In. The other explanation is that your admittedly athletic lifestyle has actually exposed you to this much sun - but I find it hard to believe, given that you have a super-serious desk job.

The next time you head to CVS or the tanning salon for your fix: STOP! You are a beautiful woman! Your clothes are great! You don't need this

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